Mar 09, 2014

Many years ago I was found on the internet by a woman who was in charge of hiring entertainment (a comedian this year) for a corporate event.  She emailed me, asked me the usual questions: What was my fee and could I do a "clean" show?

I told her my fee and she was fine with it, as I charge a middle of the road fee for a professional and experienced corporate entertainer.  Then she hesitantly asked if I could do a "clean" show.  See... 7 years earlier, she had hired a comedian for this same yearly event, a golf weekend for management.  Turns out this comedian managed to offend people so badly that it took 7 years for them to hire a comedy act again.  Obviously he didn't know his audience. 

Now let me explain something, this wasn't a government entity (with all their rules and regulations) or a company that printed hymnals.  It was a meat packing plant.  These people were management but still blue-collar to the core.  Offending them would take some work.  But the previous comedian managed to pull it off.  Mostly, I was told by my contact, by saying derogatory things about the few women in attendance.

I assured my contact that I would not offend.  She proceeded to call me every other day so that I could reassure her again and again that I would not offend.  

So, it's show day.  I get to the hotel and share the elevator to the second and top floor of the hotel with 3 other guys, one of them the CEO of the company (according to the 2 other guys), as they were chatting and joking on the way up to the 2nd floor.  I was, through observation and eavesdropping, getting to know my audience.

I arrive at the venue, meet my contact in person for the first time (let's call her Starla, although that's not her real name).  Starla asks again if I am sure I will not offend the group.  Again, I assure her I will not.

So I start the show, which was a combination stand-up comedy/hypnosis show and ended up being about 2 hours long (and they wanted more!)  About 20 minutes into the show I noticed a group of three in the back of the room (yes, the out-of-town CEO and his two out-of-town cohorts) continuing their elevator chat and joke fest.  I wanted to get them involved in the show before the rest of the group became distracted by them and would forget to pay attention to what was going on in the front of the room.

So I addressed them.  I asked the guy I who I already knew was the CEO if he was the CEO.  He said he was.  I was about to ask his name when I noticed Starla, at the front table, waving her hands frantically, mouthing "NO!"  I broke off my conversation with the back table, looked at Starla and said, "Don't worry, Starla. I know who signs my check. I'm not going to say anything inappropriate to or offend they guy who pays me."  She looked relieved.

Focusing again on the CEO, and remembering a pet word he used more than once during our elevator ride, I asked, "So, peckerhead, how long have you been CEO?"  Out of the corner of my eye I saw Starla's look of shock.  But in my main field of vision I saw CEO peckerhead literally fall out of his chair laughing.  When Starla looked back and noticed him writhing on the floor in hysterics, she let herself laugh too.  

Needless to say, because I knew my audience, the show was a major success and I was subsequently hired to do events at two of the company's other locations.  Now, I wouldn't pull that stunt at most of the companies I do shows for, but in this situation knowing my audience paid off.  If other comedians would get to know their audience (and know themselves if they were right for that audience, instead of just looking at the possible paycheck), it would not only make it easier for a lot of comedians to get work, it would also make the Starlas of the corporate world's entertainment hiring tasks much less stressful.

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